Friday the 13th, the horror.

A tale of two Monstrous Creatures and how they ruined a friendly game

So how did your Friday evening go?  Fridays are my 40K night so I went to my local "store" (they don't sell anything but snacks) to get a game in.  After being called a dick on Facebook for implying I might have the nerve to run a riptide in a "friendly" game of 40K I was hesitant to even include the one in my list lest I be that most foul of douchebags, and actually run a totally legal unit that I had spent my hard earned money on.

Luckily, my first opponent bailed to go see the hobbit before I made the tragic, nay, dickheaded move of actually playing with the one riptide I had put in my Tau list.  Shamed beyond measure that I had even considered such a shitty move as fielding the most overpowered, game breaking unit ever imagined (I'm pretty sure Matt Ward invented it),  I packed up my Tau all together before anyone else could witness my shame..  Instead I broke out what Grey Knights models I had with me (usually used as allies for my sisters).  Since no one was around I just set them up on the table to get a picture (see above).  Then I decided for kicks to make a list out of them as they sat, and made what I thought was a decent competitive list. However, in order too get it up too 1850 in addition to two squads of terminators, I also included.. now don't hate me, not just one, but TWO dreadknights (I know, it's like I have a sickness or something).  When an opponent finally arrived, I hesitantly suggested I might play my Grey Knights army against him since I'd packed up my Tau.  He agreed (I've no idea what he was even thinking to allow those two MC's on the board) and we set up a scouring game with hammer and anvil deployment. 

Not sure why I deployed so cautiously when
I'd already won the game by virtue of having 2 MC's

My opponent won the roll off to go first, and I thought he must be insane.  My GK's with 2 teleporting Dreadknights against his Tau army and he gives me first turn?  Well, I had a tough call to make.. I could just forfeit the game right there on the spot as he had obviously never faced a Monstrous creature before, and didn't realize what a dick I was being by even playing them, or, I could just down play them a bit and try not to table him on turn one..  I'm not sure how I'd have managed the former, but given all the hatred that's been directed at my other monstrous creatures, I could only assume that would be the result. (The fact that he made a number of comments about really disliking that my DK's could move 30" AND still fire their weapon only further confirmed for me that I really was being a dick by bringing these two over powered units and that I should try to do something to make it fare since I couldn't remove them from my list at this point.)

I chose the latter and rather than jumping up and flaming his two units of firewarriors too my left, thus removing half of his scoring units from the game on turn 1, I jumped over and flamed a unit of wraithguard which had a respectable 3+ save thus negating the OP stats of my heavy incinerator, and also at his commander leading a squad of drones.   The commander had a 2+ save and was out front so this seemed like a fair tactic given that I had 2 monstrous creatures and all.  Amazingly, I only managed to kill 2 wraithguard, though I did snipe his spiritseer out of the unit with my vindicare,
another douche move, and generate no unsaved wounds on his commander..   I really figured that with my auto-win MC's over there that those two units would be dead by now, but apparently the internet had lied to me, and MC's aren't quite that powerful.  No matter, I figured I'd finish him off turn 2..  On his first turn he shot at me with his 3 remaining Wraithguard managing to hit with all 3 shots.. Did you know those little bastards have str 10 ap2 guns that cause instant death on a 6?  I did, but really hadn't thought much about it cuz I had two TWO dreadknights over there and you can't kill a MC right?.. Oh wait, holey crap, he rolled 2 6's and wounded with the other shot?..  Well Ok.. That was unexpected, I guess luckily DK's aren't fearless so I went to ground for a 3+ cover save and managed to save the two instant death hits (I rolled 5's of course making the going to ground pointless).  He put a bunch of shooting into my vindicar after that and killed him, plus he took a couple wounds off the other dreadknight as well.  I'm really baffled at this point cuz the internet made me expect that he'd have lost by now, or at the very least be unable to wound my Dreadknights.  What ever, my turn 2.



I rolled for reserves, and got a squad of terminators, but my Stormraven loaded with both my hq's, a dreadnought, and 5 terminators including justicar Thawn didn't come on.  I thought for sure my monstrous creatures would somehow force my reserves to arrive, and that perhaps that's where the mystic overpowering abilities they possess would come into play, but no such luck..  They didn't help at all..  What ever, they were both on the board and I was about to table my opponent now that my Terminators had arrived (they are like cheaty little mini MC's with their 2+ saves and all)..  I just had to wait for him to make his interceptor shots on my terminators no worries..  Wait, 3 hits, and 3 wounds?  No worries, their termin... Oh.. Failed a 2+  and lost a terminator.. Right.. What ever, I've got  8 6 storm bolter shots with psybolt ammo (I've heard that it's basically cheating too) and a Psycannon..  I put 5 wounds into his solo crisis suit that was hanging around back of the firewarriors in order to provide supporting fire via 2 flamers should I charge.  With his 3+ save combined with the fact that I had 2 Monstrous creatures on the board, which has been clearly explained as ruining games, I felt certain that his crisis suit would die.  Turns out he instead made all of his 3+ saves and didn't even take a wound.  My first DK had gone to ground, and only having a template weapon couldn't snap shot anything so he just laid there which again seemed odd.. I guess MC's have to follow all the basic rules that other units follow.  Well, my other DK went ahead and jumped past the wraithguard to engage his commander and the drone squad.  After getting 6 hits with my incinerator on the squad the commander had the nerve to save versus all but 1.  Fine, it's the assault phase, and my DK is about to shitwreck that pathetic Tau commander and his wussy little drones.   As I had to assault through terrain, my init is reduced to one.. Given that things aren't going as expected thus far, I decided to play it safe and challenge his warlord to avoid 16 drone attacks before I ever get a swing in.  His cowardly warlord declined and just sat at the back.  My dreadknight takes a bunch of hits but saves, then generates 5 wounds on the unit of which he manages to save 3 on shield drones which are in base with me, then loses 2 out of 3 shield drones in the unit.   His commander passes the 8 up leadership  and we stay locked in combat.  I'm not even sure how that just happened and why my Dreadknight did not just murder the entire unit. 

On his turn 2 his reserves all come on of course, his crisis team lands right by that center objective, his firewarriors walk on behind longstrike, and his bomber comes on and detaches it's interceptor drones.  I can't help but feel bad for him.  As soon as my super bad ass Stormraven come in from reserves it's going to destroy that pathetic Tau flyer that he has.. I'm not even sure why he put's that thing in his list.  Oh.. well turns out it can shoot 2 shots from it's Missile Pods and two seeker missiles, and a Markerlight..  Oh, and the two drones get 2 shots each (at bs2 pffsht) twin-linked and with skyfire and interceptor, and are str 7 ap 4...   Wait, what?  That doesn't sound to bad.. But it must suck.  Everyone says it sucks..  After his turn 2 shooting is over, I no longer have one of my dreadknights (it turns out they are not by any means impossible to kill) nor my terminators..  It turns out that a squad of firewarriors puts out a shitload of shots, and that statistically, you will eventually fail a 2+ save..   I'm really at a loss at this point, if it weren't for my Dreadknight that is locked in combat, I'd have just been tabled.  No worries, my dreadknight is about too.. No hes not.  My DK gets pummled inneffectually by the drones, while I roll nothing but 1's and 2's.. Then reroll and get 1 hit and wound which his remaing shield drone tanks like a pro.. Tied combat.  TIED COMBAT.. My shitwrecking, game breaking monstrous creature melee machine just had a tied combat against a bunch of Tau Drones...

Turn 3, my reserves arrive.  I fly my storm raven straight up the board to get my guys into combat as fast as possible... Fine Fine.. He gets interceptor fire from his stupid ethereal on the quadgun.. Ok, he hits twice.. NO I don't want to jink, I'm AV12 there is no way he is going too... Oh.. 2 glancing hits on 5's.. really?  What are the chances.. w/e.. oh wait, those interceptor drones, right.. they are only bs2 so no big...  "what, 2 hits do I want to jink?"  "No I don't want to jink I have storm raven no way are you going to..."  Two more glancing hits and my stormraven is wrecked and every one in it is ... Yeah screw this, game over... 

As I pack up my army I replay the game in my head.  How did I possibly lose with Two Dreadknights on the board against an army with NO monstrous creatures?  A dreadknight is just as tough as a Riptide.  It is way better in melee than any Riptide.  It's incinerator should delete tau units wholesale..  But it turns out that the whole myth that playing monstrous creatures gives you some kind of unbeatable advantage is just that.  A myth.  It's not true.  It turns out that even lacking any monstrous creatures at all, that a well made list has plenty of ability to destroy a monstrous creature.  I've spent the better part of a couple days trying to defend the use of Riptides as not being a big deal.  I got chastised and insulted and called a dick as payment for my efforts.  As such, I played a non-aggressive game because my opponent had also bemoaned the use of my Dreadknights and I felt obligated to be nice, to not be a dick..  In the end, those two dreadknights did ruin the game.  They ruined it for me.